Category Archives: Cultural Issues

Wedding Today

Cultural Issues, Family Life, Marriage/Weddings, Ministry, Personal Growth
February 8, 2015

A few weeks ago a young Chinese couple came to see me and asked if I would do their wedding. As NDSU students, they knew that I had married other Chinese couples and asked me to do their wedding, planned to be in just two weeks. Although I was complimented by their request I cringed a bit inside. Back in 1977, I made a personal rule that I would not marry anyone unless they did some kind of marriage preparation. There have been a few exceptions to that rule and as I talked to them, I felt that this was one of those times.

First of all, Dalu and Cuiyuan had no way of knowing about things like marriage preparation. They have friends at the F-M Chinese Christian church, but they do not regularly attend.

Secondly, Cuiyuan’s parents were going to be here (coming from China) on the weekend planned for their wedding. Those kinds of plans are not easy to change.

Third, they were willing to do marriage “preparation” with me after their wedding. Not the best plan since the motivation to work hard at marriage preparation is much less after the wedding, but I have done that before.

In the end as I talked to them, I decided to say yes to officiating their wedding.

Their original plan was to have their wedding at Dalu’s NDSU apartment. But, as they invited their friends to come, they discovered that the apartment would be too small. In the end, I offered them the use of our church building and they decided to use the fellowship hall. So today Dalu and Cuiyuan will set up our fellowship hall for their wedding at 2:00. They will probably be setting things up as our worship service ends this morning.

As we gather today and as you think about this wedding, please pray for Dalu and Cuiyuan and their family and friends as they come. Pray that they will find Jesus and one day put their lives in His hands. Pray that as I share some of the meaning of marriage from the Bible, that it will touch their hearts and have the ring of authority that can come only from biblical truth. Pray also that as we do marriage preparation, after their wedding, that it will equip them for a healthier marriage and give us an opportunity to talk more about the important spiritual side of life.

Throughout my ministry God has used me as I have helped couples with their wedding and their marriage. It is a special opportunity for ministry that few can have. It is my prayer that I will be sensitive to the Lord’s leading and the needs of Dalu and Cuiyuan as we share this special time in their lives.

Your pastor,

Dude Garrett

Good Business or Selfishness

Bible Ideas, Cultural Issues, Family Life, Personal Growth
February 1, 2015

Today is Super Bowl XLIX (that is 49 for us who are not familiar with Roman numerals). Some of us are old enough to remember the first Super Bowl (I remember it because I grew up in Kansas and the Kansas City Chiefs played in the first Super Bowl (I won’t talk about who they played or who won).   That was also back when the NFL and the AFL were leagues competing with each other, rather than conferences under one league as they are today. Things have changed a lot in the last 49 years.

You might remember that a few years ago, the NFL stopped churches and other groups from showing the televised Super Bowl to groups on its premises. It was a copyrighted telecast and the NFL wanted control and revenue (money) from its use. In more recent years, the NFL has become even more strict in licensing the use of the name “Super Bowl.” In fact, few businesses are permitted to use the name and those who use it illegally often face charges and fines.

Roger N. Behle Jr., an intellectual property lawyer, said the NFL’s monitoring is about maximizing revenue. “They do have a right to police it. They spent a lot of money to build the brand up, make it profitable and not have any Tom, Dick and Harry use the marks.” Behle has worked on licensing deals with the NFL and other major sports leagues.

According to another advertizing lawyer in New York, Jeff Greenbaum, the NFL’s strict enforcement of their trademarked name “is to create enough concern among marketers that they’re afraid to even get close to the line.”

It seems to me that the NFL has decided to use it huge resources (both popularity and money) to defend its right to make as much money as legally possible and to prevent others from piggybacking on their success. While I do not condemn them for trying to make money, I do call into question their efforts to prevent others from sharing in their success.

Does it diminish the NFL’s success if others share in it? It think not. In fact, I would suggest that if the NFL would be glad to share their success, it would benefit all involved. That is the principle of generosity. If I share my success, it becomes even more successful. If I hoard my success, one day it may be gone.

The Super Bowl is BIG business. And while I do not begrudge its success, I would call into question its apparent selfishness. As we watch and cheer the game, let us not be blind to the realities of life. Proverbs 18:1 says, “An unfriendly man pursues selfish ends; he defies all sound judgment.” Be careful NFL, for a business dependent on its fan base, you may one day wish you were more generous.

Your pastor,

Dude Garrett

Sanctity and Sin

Bible Ideas, Cultural Issues, Grief, The Good News
January 18, 2015

Today is our recognition of the Sanctity of Human Life. Although we do not focus very much on special emphases for the Sundays of the year, this is one that I have followed for a long time. Those who are regular attendees of our church know that most years, I preach a message that focuses on the Sanctity of Life and its biblical foundation.   Today I will do that again and even the music will follow that same theme. It is my prayer that this emphasis will help us fight the trend in our world to devalue life and miss the wonder of being God’s special creation, “made in His image.”

As I work on this message, I am struck by the affect of sin on the sanctity of life. It is not a correlation I have considered before. Yes, I know we are all sinners and that our sin has separated us from God and His holiness, but I am more attentive today to the fact that sin keeps us from accepting the wonder and beauty of our simple daily lives.

When we sin, it pushes us away from God and when we reject God, we lose the reason for seeing life as wonderful and special. Sin makes us think that life is what we make it, rather than a gift from our Creator. Sin convinces us that some lives are not worth as much as others and even that our lives may not be worth enough to keep on living. My sinfulness pushes God out of my life and when He is kicked out, I loose all reason to see life as valuable, significant and worth living.

However, when I repent of my sin, turn back to my Creator, I discover that life is valuable just because it is a gift from God. He is the author of life and when I give Him His rightful place of authority, I can receive His gift of life in its beauty and simplicity. The wonder of being God’s child is far reaching. It makes each day special. It gives me worth without the baggage of accomplish, peer pressure, wealth and even happiness. Even something as simple as happiness is tied to what I’ve done, what I have, or what I want. All of those are centered around ME, my sinful self-centeredness. When I release that sinfulness to the Savior, in return He gives me the simple job of just being His child. That relationship of trust brings our Creator great glory and brings us great satisfaction.   I love John Piper’s insight, “God is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him.”

Psalm 8 says that God “made man a little lower than the heavenly beings and crowned him with glory and honor.” If we can believe that, it gives each one of us a reason to experience the joy and wonder of the Sanctity of Human Life. We need to turn away from our sin and receive the great gift of God, LIFE. Will you turn your face to the Creator and receive that gift?

 

Your pastor,

Dude Garrett

The Year of the Sheep

Bible Ideas, Cultural Issues, Ministry, The Good News

 

March 1, 2015

The Chinese new year began on Feb 19. It is now the year of the sheep. Since the new year festival is the most important holiday in China, I took time on Friday to ask my Chinese friends more about their new year. It was fun to ask them questions and to have them ask me questions too.

They were all surprised to learn that I knew it was now the year of the sheep. Since I had also read that it was the year of the goat, I asked them which it was. They told me that there is no real distinction in China between goats and sheep. They also told me that being born in the year of the sheep is unlucky to many in China. Therefore, some families would try not to have a child this year. One lady said that the lower birth rate this year would actually make the children born this year lucky. They would have less competition for college, jobs and other important opportunities. (Interesting that the “unlucky” year for children would in practice be more “lucky” for them.)

As we talked about Chinese life and culture, it came to me that since this was the beginning of the year of the sheep, we should read about Jesus who calls himself, the Good Shepherd. So, after questions and conversation were concluded, I asked them if we could read about Jesus describing himself as the Good Shepherd. They were glad to do that.

As we read John 10, it struck me very powerfully that Jesus’ description of the Good Shepherd and the sheep was all about personal connection between Jesus and those who follow Him. His sheep hear His voice, they follow Him, they know Him and He takes care of them. All those words describe the personal connection that Jesus has with His people, those of us who are Christians.

I thought this was so important because for many people new to America and to Christianity, they think of Christianity as a religion, or a set of moral values or even a philosophy. But according to Jesus in John 10, Christianity is all about connecting with the Good Shepherd, learning to recognize His voice and following Him in a relationship of trust. I told my Chinese friends that Christianity is actually all about a personal connection with Jesus who is alive and offering to be the Good Shepherd in our lives. In fact, Jesus says that He will “lay down his life for his sheep.”

As we talked about Jesus’ words in John 10, I told them the rest of the story. That Jesus did indeed lay down His life for His sheep. He died on the cross so that our sins would be forgiven and so that personal connection with Him could become a possibility. In every way you look at it, Jesus is indeed the Good Shepherd. Now it is our turn. Will we put our lives into His hands?   Will we be His sheep?

Your pastor,

Dude Garrett

Mariom and Eduardo’s Wedding

Cultural Issues, Family Life, Marriage/Weddings, Worship

July 28, 2013

Planning and executing a wedding is hard work.  I know, I’ve helped plan more than 40 of them in the 30+ years I have been a pastor.  That is really not a lot for 30 years of ministry as a pastor, but it does qualify me to speak to the challenge and hard work of planning a wedding.

I think it is very important that a wedding reflect the wishes and heart of the bride and groom.  So, when a couple asks me to help them with their wedding, I give them a lot of room to express their personality and their individuality.  After all, it is not my wedding, it is theirs.

In the last few years I have had the special privilege of working with several international student couples who wished to get married here in Fargo.  Even though they wanted an “American” kind of wedding, I still wanted them to put their own personal touches on the service.  In every case, it has been a pleasure to help them through the planning.

That has been especially true of Mariom and Eduardo’s wedding.  At first they seemed to be content with my planning, but as we went along, more and more their wishes came to the surface.

First they did not have a “wedding party” as most couples.  They would stand by themselves and Mariom would walk down the isle alone.  Then, they decided on songs for walking in and walking out (processional and recessional) that I did not expect.  One was even from the Disney “Tarzan” movie.  But they fit – very well, even the words were most appropriate (though we did not sing the words).

Then, the scriptures they selected for reading in their ceremony were not what I expected.  Mariom selected Colossians 3:23-24 and Eduardo selected Matthew 7:24-27.  Read them over and see what you think.  The more I thought about them, the more I liked those verses.

Then they picked other songs to sing – congregational songs.  One was from our hymnal, but I had never noticed it before.  The words were perfect. And finally, they wanted to play a video song by Chris Tomlin.  It was a song we have sung with the worship team, but I had never thought of it for a wedding, “How Great Is Our God.”  They wanted to do an international version with 5 different languages – more than 6 minutes long (that’s a long song).  At first I was skeptical that it would work, but the more I played the song and thought about it, the more I liked it.  After all, their wedding was an international affair.  They were thousands of miles from home, they had friends from other cultures in attendance and singing to the Lord praise at the end of the ceremony, in 5 different languages was the PERFECT ending.  The more I thought about it, the more I was caught up in praise.

I hope you were here to enjoy the wedding.  If not, you missed a wonderful blessing.  It was a celebration of the gift of marriage, but it was also a time of worship.  And, best of all, the more I thought about it, the deeper the worship soaked in. THANKS, Mariom and Eduardo!

Your Pastor,

Dude Garrett

Want to talk to Pastor Dude?  Give him a call on his cell phone (701)261-0931.