March 15, 2015
Lately, I have been thinking about the difference between friendship and fellowship. In many ways, I suspect we often think of them as the same. I am not so sure that is a good connection to make.
When I think of my friendships I think of the people I met and enjoyed their company at pivotal times in my life. As a young boy I had friends. Some of them are still my friends today. When I started graduate school in Denver, Karon and I developed friendships with a few other couples in similar stages of life and with similar responsibilities. In our first pastorate in Devils Lake, with new babies added to our family, once again Karon and I found friends in similar stages of life. It seems like friendship is a combination of personal connections, common life situations, and shared experiences. I am not sure that friendship can be created. It can be discovered, it can be cultivated and it certainly can be lost, but I do not think we can be commanded to make a friend of a certain person. In fact, the more I think about it, the more good friendships are like gifts from God. They are more rare than we might like and very precious when we have them. Since we are on the subject, is there a friendship that you need to cultivate, appreciate, and encourage in your life right now?
How about fellowship?
When I think of fellowship my first thought is the meaning of the Greek word we usually translate as fellowship. That word might more accurately be translated as partnership. In fact, in Philippians 1:5 the NIV does use partnership as its English translation.
When we read the New Testament we see that fellowship is a reality of life in the church. Fellowship with the Spirit brings us into fellowship with each other (see Acts 2:42; Philippians 2; I John 1:3, 7). It is not optional nor situational. We who believe are partners because of our common bond in Jesus. Being connected to Jesus means I am connected to others who are connected to Jesus.
If I contrast partnership and friendship I notice right away that fellowship is much broader and less personal. We can have fellowship, without friendship. The demands of friendship are more personal, the demands of fellowship are more godly. Fellowship will not happen without godly love, forgiveness, grace and compassion. Yes, those are part of friendship too, but they tend to happen more naturally and with less discipline. Fellowship requires choice, commitment, selflessness, and respect. All of these we give because of JESUS, not because our partner deserves it. Fellowship is a choice we make, friendship is a gift we receive.
These are my thoughts…what do you think about friendship and fellowship?
